When I was daygaming in Riga I met many guys who wanted to learn game and try to get laid with Riga hotties. There were a few guys who succeeded. But most of them haven’t gotten too far. They seem to be stuck or progressing very slow.
I went to Prague and saw the same. There is a daygame community. But only a few guys are getting laid regularly. The rest are inspired by top guy’s results but struggling themselves.
I went to Antwerp, Belgium next. And it was the same there. Almost no one in the local daygame scene is getting laid constantly.
I’ve heard the same about London and many other cities.
I noticed guys who were struggling to get real results kept making 4 mistakes.
I’ll take a daygamer I know as an example. Let’s call him Gabriel.
First let’s talk about wings
For Gabriel it was easier to go out with other guys. But most of guys he went out with also struggle in game. Often times they were worse than Gabriel. I even told him “don’t go out with those guys. You see they are bad and are not willing to change and learn”. He agreed. And kept going out with the same guys. WTF?
If you can’t find daygamers that are around the same level or better – learn to go out alone.
“You’re the average of the five daygamers you go out the most time with”. St. Robert
Wings are just a small part of game. They will not teach you to go out consistently, find your mistakes and fix them. They might help. But wings aren’t what makes you a good daygamer.
The most important parts are the ones you do on your own.
3 other things Gabriel was struggling with:
2. Not going out enough
When he started out he couldn’t overcome his approach anxiety. And when he did, it was hard to do enough sets every week. He worked a lot and went to a gym constantly. Finding time to go out at least every other day was hard. After a little(2 month long) help from me he got to doing 25 sets most weeks. But it took him total around 1 year to get from discovering game to doing 25 sets/week regularly.
3. Doing the wrong things
In the next “phase” Gabriel was going out a lot. But he wasn’t getting numbers. After he started getting some numbers they would not respond. He was reading books, watching online courses and YouTube videos on daygame. But couldn’t crack it. He didn’t know what he was doing wrong. He tried recording sets. And that helped. He slowly started to improve.
4. Having “game breakdowns”
And then the 3rd phase hit. He had been learning daygame for more than a year. And wasn’t getting laid nearly as much as he expected. He started asking “Will I ever be good at daygame? Maybe it works for some guys but not for me?”. Gabriel started having little “game breakdowns”. Once in a while he got back into old habits of drinking. Other times “couldn’t find time because of business”. Some guys just keep being motivated to go ahead. Doesn’t matter if they’re having a great vibe in sets. Or having a long streak of bad sets. They keep going out. And for some guys it’s hard to keep going when they see so little improvement.
There are guys who can overcome approach anxiety, learn to go out enough, figure out how to have great sets and keep going out consistently. But what I saw in Riga, Prague, Antwerp and heard about many other cities showed it’s not as easy as people think.
There are 3 ways you can work on your game:
- learning it on your own
- taking daygame trips and
- getting daygame coaching.
I will talk about the good and bad sides of each of them in the next blog post.
Which phase are you at now? Getting to 25 sets/week? Working a lot on your sets to improve conversions? Or being dedicated and going out all the time?